A desire is most of the time sparked by a thought then followed by an emotion. Both fate and GOD work in mysterious ways, that we should never try to comprehend them but observe & ask for his blessings before undertaking your path. Thats how i have experience it in my life, my accounts may defer from others but thats a good thing because "I WRITE MY OWN LIFE JOURNEY".
I was a playful kid back when i was in primary school. I would always just pass my exams and gave teachers trouble which would lead to my parents coming down to have tea sessions with my teachers, till a point where near all hope was lost. HAHAHA.... However, all of these changed. When i was 12 years old i remembered as clear as yesterday i was rushing from farrer court where i spent my vacation days at my aunts place having fun with my cousin. We were all very anxious for my results. I reached school quite late compared to rest of my friends.
I saw faces of all kind be it joy, contentment and also disappointment. I was really anxious when i approached my teacher and asked him for my result. His first impression when he saw me was disappointment. He told me that he had a feeling that i didnt really do well for my exam and that i was heading for the normal technical stream. I did my best not to believe him till reality bite me. I was dumb folded after receiving the results as i saw & felt the entire world came crashing down on me that day. Family and friends around me also fell in their spirits when they heard of the bad news. I felt lost and worse part of all out of place.
Fortunately, i manage to bounce back in spirits after a few weeks and accepted the reality of things and i sorted to change things as it was a NEW BEGINNING. The desire in the beginning was not so strong yet. I met some good friends here and there from my new school and socialized with others not from my stream. The funny thing about how i made my first break-thru was from my first mid year exam results, after i finish my mid year exams i felt not only relieved but a sense of confidence that i had not felt for a long time and something in my gut told me that it was good. Which was true when i was acknowledge by my teacher to be 2nd in class and subsequently in the finals i obtained 1st overall standard best in secondary one.
I felt one thing about climbing the route to success is to small chunk it and take it one step at a time. Then double the results. Which at the same time was a secret formula of how the rich got richer. An example of that would be how they would accumulate $1000 then once they found that out they would find a way to shorten the time and double the amount they made. However, due to my success, i made some enemies along the way. I believe it was due to jealousy and maybe my lack of social skills at that point in time. I remembered that when i was the best and i was even challenged by someone that they would take my position next year. I did not have many close friends and most of my close friends were from other streams or schools.
The next year, i was proud and took things alittle easier. The first half of the year showed my decline in results but i still manage to maintain top 3 position. And after my final year exams as the results are out but not yet tabulated. We more or less knew where we stood and the person who warned me last year taunted me this time with this phrase " Hey man, how come last time you were so capable. But now you are like shit." I didn't feel much at 1st but only embarrassment and insulted. However, due to that it ignited a fire so great in me that it fueled me for much more better conquest in future. I also learned something from the world's top table tennis person who once quoted "It easy to get to the top but the hard part is maintaining championship as you will always be facing more champions." The subsequent year i didn't do that well either but manage to maintain myself at top 4. The last year in secondary school was the most interesting one i had. It was a fight to the finish. The best part about this was there will not be interference on results from many test and exams but only one major exam which was the N levels.
It was a fierce battle between the top. Back and forth our small test and mid year and exam were moving in ranks. Then it came to the prelims where i manage to clinch the top 3 again. To my surprise i had the last laugh of the day as i was THE TOP N LEVEL STUDENT in my school and i jumped for joy. I shared the joy and happiness with my love ones and the course which i wanted to pursue was in my hands. The only thing i could say based on this experience is the route to glory is has alot of ups and downs in it. Time will be your greatest enemy, followed by challenges. Once you overcome both of them you are on your way to GLORY. One of my secrets for going through these periods and also improving myself in gathering knowledge was FAITH!! I would pray to him before every exam and test i would take and visit mass and catholic class weekly. I always believed that GOD help those who help themselves and at times. I admit i didn't get what i want and may have even been angry him and asked him why did i not get it. There is a reason to it, however we should never understand the reason thru our human minds but let it be revealed over time because GOD does things in mysterious ways and no worldly knowledge we posses can ever comprehend. I will always remember this 70 year 8th dan Karate Master quoted " Always move forward both failures and success is part of the journey to mastery"!!
An example would be my poor results in my PSLE. I believed he knew that i was a slow learner and would take more time. As a result of that my confidence grew and ambition as well. The desire which was instilled in me was really so over whelming that i made ITE Hall of Fame. But i will leave that to another story.........
